Hand mixer

Why We Chose It

This KitchenAid mixer is the best choice if you enjoy pretending like you're on a cooking show while making boxed cake mixes. Its seven speeds are almost as varied as your mood swings, and the Flex Edge Beaters do such a thorough job that even your grandmother's secret recipe can't complain. It's the #1 Mixer Brand, according to a source that sounds suspiciously like KitchenAid's marketing department. Plus, it comes with an integrated storage clip, because who doesn't love clipping things? If you're tired of mixers that don't hold a candle to your ambition or just tired in general, this is the mixer for you.

What It Does

• Mixes like it's auditioning for a job.
• 7 speeds, because 6 was too boring.
• Storage clip, for organizational overachievers.
• Dishwasher-safe, because scrubbing is for chumps.

What It Doesn't Do

• Won't iron your chef hat.
• Doesn't come with a personal sous-chef.
• Won't make your cakes less burnt.
• No guarantee of Instagram-worthy results.

Tech Specs

• 6 Speed Hand Mixer that forgot the 7th speed.
• Flex Edge Beaters: 2X surface area, 0X complaints.
• Pro Whisk for those who whisk like pros in their dreams.
• Integrated clip that clips like it’s going out of style.

Who It's For

Meet Jane, a domestic goddess wannabe who thinks a hand mixer will make her the next Julia Child. Then there's Bob, who bought this mixer just to say he owns something from the #1 Mixer Brand, whatever that means. Lastly, we have Susan, who uses the mixer not for its capabilities, but because she enjoys the soothing whirring sound it makes, reminiscent of a simpler time when she didn't have to bake cookies for the PTA. They all have one thing in common: a penchant for gadgets that promise more than they can deliver, much like their New Year's resolutions.